ANIMALS TALKING IN ALL CAPS

I DON’T KNOW, YOU KNOW? IT’S LIKE, PLEASE GOD, NO MORE RAIN, RIGHT? I MEAN, I COULD TRAVEL AROUND WITH A POCKET FLATIRON FOR MY BANGS, AND OBVIOUSLY A NICE HOODED JACKET IS A MUST, BUT MY HAIR STILL ALWAYS LOOKS TERRIBLE BY MID-AFTERNOON. I’M PRETTY SURE WE’VE ALL GOT A BOTTLE OF ROOT LIFTER AT HOME, AND THAT’S SORT OF HELPFUL. I USE GIOVANNI ORGANICS BECAUSE THEY DON’T TEST ON MY FRIENDS, BUT IT’S JUST LIKE, HOW MUCH TIME CAN I SPEND UPSIDE DOWN BLOW DRYING MY HAIR BEFORE I PASS OUT, AND DOES IT REALLY PROVIDE THE VOLUME I WANT AFTER A DAY OF RUNNING ERRANDS IN A MONSOON? SOMETIMES I JUST TOSS IT UP IN A LOOSE BUN OR A TOPKNOT AND THAT’S PRETTY CONVENIENT, BUT I DON’T WANT TO GO TO MEETINGS WITH CLIENTS LOOKING LIKE I JUST STEPPED OUT OF CARDIO BALLET.

IT’S JUST SO FRUSTRATING. THEY SHOULD JUST GIVE US ALL OF APRIL OFF WORK.